Underblog.co.uk

Indeed it is certain, it is clear to see, that the earth itself is more cultivated and developed than in early times … The most charming farms obliterate empty spaces, ploughed fields vanquish forests, sandy places are planted with crops, stones are fixed, swamps are drained, and there are great cities where formerly hardly a hut … everywhere there is a dwelling, everywhere a multitude, everywhere a government, everywhere there is life. The greatest evidence of the large number of people: we are burdensome to the world, the resources are scarcely adequate to us and our needs straiten us and complaints are everywhere while already nature does not sustain us. Truly, pestilence and hunger and war and flood must be considered as a remedy for nations, like a pruning back of the human race becoming excessive in numbers.”
– Quintus Septimus Florens Tertillianus, Roman citizen, circa 200 A.D., when the world population was about 200 million

Here is a list of annoying things that have happened to me over the past week, each with a suitably over-dramatic heading in the style of annoying TV programmes.

When Computer Gremlins Attack! Yep. My shiny new PC has been having a few problems. Firstly, the CPU kept overheating. A call to the technical support number revealed the problem:

Support: Is it the PC with the black case with a kind of glass panel at the front?
Underblog: Yeah.
Support: Oh yeah, with that particular model one of the fans has been installed in the wrong place.
Underblog: Err, okay…

And they thought they’d wait to see if I noticed? Anyway, thankfully the guy talked me through how to move it on the phone, so I didn’t need an engineer to come out. Then, last week, the thing just stopped booting. I rang last Wednesday and they said that an engineer would call me within 48 hours to arrange a visit. That was last week and I’m still waiting.

Wasps… FROM HELL! I was awoken early Friday morning by a tingling on my elbow. (Alright, it was 2pm, but I still hadn’t got up.) I can’t really endow this story suspense and surprises since it is quite obvious from this paragraph’s heading that it was a wasp. Which stung me. Somewhat miffed that it had decided to ignore my strict “No Wasps” policy regarding my bed (which had been put in place after I was stung on the sole of my foot last summer) I rolled over and covered my self with my duvet, thinking that the evil insect had flown off. It hadn’t. The buzzing I’d heard was actually just the wasp making the short flight from my elbow to my arse, where it stung again, just above the right-hand cheek.

Understandably, my thoughts at this point were along the lines of “sod this for a lark”. I got up, went to the toilet and pulled down my boxers so that I might enjoy my first urination of the day. It was with considerable surprise that I observed a large wasp fly out of my boxer shorts. I suppose it shouldn’t have been such a shock, since the last known location of the creature was in the vicinity of my arse, but to my half-asleep brain it was unexpected. To cut a short story shorter, the wasp escaped out the window, and the stings still itch a bit. And I made a pretty bad joke the following day about wasps not knowing their arses from their elbows.

When Laptops Fall. I tripped over the mains cable from my laptop, pulling it of the desk and snapping the CD draw. I can’t get it fixed until my desktop is working again. Bugger.

Right, I really think I should provide a link vaguely related to this post. How about this silly cartoon. OK, it’s not actually related at all, except that it captures the mad panic of seeing a scary animal quite amusingly.

If you’re reading this on Tuesday evening, take a look out the window, because tonight there will be a lunar eclipse. The process begins at 20:52 British Summer Time, and will be over by 22:08. It will be visible from Asia, Africa, Australia, South American and Europe.

In a lunar eclipse the moon passes behind the earth’s shadow, which stops the sun’s light from reaching it. If the skies are clear you might see the moon turn a dark red colour, as scattered red light from sunrises and sunsets taking place around the earth falls on it.

–Update: Well, I saw it for a couple of minutes when it emerged from behind the clouds just after ten o’ clock. No photos though, unfortunately.

I used to collect beards. Well, pictures of beardy people from newspapers to be precise. Oh, and once or twice one of my like-minded cohorts and I surreptitiously photographed good specimens among members of the public. It all started with Richard Stallman, who’s hairy countenance, when I saw it smiling out at me from the pages of the Guardian, filled me with a deep sense of awe and respect. From there it grew into an obsession, and at one stage my “wall of beards” had pictures of over 50 notables from the facial hair world.

I was only ever interested in full-on ungroomed facial hair; none of this coiffured nonsense. Real beards should be motivated by a dislike of shaving and a flagrant disregard for ones personal appearance, not a desire look like Craig David. If you’re going to shave, why not shave it all? I’m sure maintaining a neatly trimmed goatee and ‘tash combo takes far more effort than an all-over shave, yet it makes you look silly. What’s the point?

Anyway, I went to Cambridge yesterday, and there are some truly excellent beards there. I used to think that crazy-haired scientists and other bushy-faced academics had beards because they were far too busy thinking intelligent stuff to make time for a facial hygiene routine, but an old maths teacher of mine from school (who has quite a good beard himself) insists that it is “an image thing” in academic circles. Good for them, I say.

This post was inspired by Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow at Kebabylon.

I wasn’t going to post today. I’m feeling sickened, angry and frankly pretty scared by the shameful treatment of Iraqi prisoners by US and UK troops and I wasn’t sure that I wanted this to be that sort of site. But I’ve decided on a personal blog these things are inevitable.

I’m angry at the reaction of at least one of the american soldiers involved, which amounted to “We weren’t told that making prisoners perform sexual acts at gunpoint is wrong”.

I’m scared because of the inevitable (and understandable) reaction by the already angry population of Iraq, and the arab world in general. I heard on the evening news that the commander of Camp X-ray is flying to Iraq to sort the mess out. Given the international controversy surrounding Guantanamo Bay, I’m concerned that perhaps he wasn’t the wisest choice for this job. Still, lets hope he can make sure this isn’t happening anywhere else.

On a happier note, ten countries join the european union today. Welcome aboard. Although I accept what Pawell Huelle writes in the Guardian:

Poles do not see our acceptance in the EU as … a special present from the west. We were always part of Europe.